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You’re so shit it’s unbelievable! | The Audacious Art Experiment | Get involved MENU

March 24, 2011 Comments (2) Views: 2089 Field recordings, Free downloads, Music, Uncategorized, Writing and Poetry

You’re so shit it’s unbelievable!

Last saturday i woke up in a completely blacked out room, which was an unusual experience as my bedroom generally doesn’t have a curtain. After getting over the immediate throws of “Where the fuck am i?” and “Am i alone?” i realised i was down our practice space. I’d fled there the night before to get some well earned rest and alone time, from the predictable weekend chaos that is the squat i choose to live in. Once i’d pulled myself together and slung a coffee down my neck, i decided to check out the world outside and opened the front door to a jaw dropping sight. Our practice space is situated just off Bramhall Lane in Sheffield, which those of you with an average to good general knowledge will know as the home of Sheffield United FC. I’d been eager to hang around the area on a saturday as i’d never really seen it in it’s full glory and by judging the huge police presence and piles upon piles of traffic cones, it looked like i’d picked the right day.

As a steward passed my door i took the opportunity to get some information out of him. What with yellow coats being the purest breed of all jobsworths and all, i knew he’d oblige and have an opinion on the matter.
“Who’ve they got today mate? I asked. The Steward stopped and looked me up and down, jaw hanging, clocking my blue and white bobble hat i’d forgotten to remove.
“It’s Leeds!”. He said fearfully. “And i am not kiddin’ you pal, i would not, repeat, not be around here after half eleven”.
As his words hit my still pillow muffled ears, i found it hard to hide my excitement and decided to let my smirk crawl all over my face like ants on a campers jam jar.
“Leeds!” i gasped “Mate, i wouldn’t miss this for the fucking world! I mean we all hate Leeds don’t we?”
The steward cracked a grin “Aye pal, aye”.

I’d been dying to do some field recordings of the area on saturday for quite some time and it seemed like today was the perfect day, so i soon got myself out and about trying to source a condensor mic from someone. After a sticky run around in the first sunny saturday of the year, i finally got what i needed and headed back down to the space just in time for the second half. In a 50 minute recording i managed to circle the ground once, past police blockades and even sneak in for the last five minutes of the match

It’s important to point out, that although i am an avid football fan, i have (i think) a grander appreciation for “The game culture loves to hate” than simply watching men kick a ball around a field, like twenty two ducks would chase bread round a pond. Not even is it the unpredictability of the entire match that mostly draws me in, sending me into fits of wonder and worry like a bad relationship. A roller-coaster of emotions that i cannot control and constantly bemoan myself for agreeing to.
For me, my love for football is simply that, it is the last place on earth where people can gather in their thousands and legally cheer, goad, vent weekly frustrations and sing folk songs of solidarity among people they barely know, if at all. It’s the last community theatre, in a world where staying in alone, hooked up to your intravenous glow tube and drip feed dongles is societies cultural and social norm.

So regardless of what you think about the game of ball. Why not treat yourself to a listen of what i heard in and around the streets of my fair neighbourhood, filled with “hooligans and louts” that saturday afternoon and compare it to drone of ‘Suburban John’ next door mowing his lawn again. Or the faint clink clink of a high brow wine bar, where all of its patron’s sit silent in flaccid first date couples, too proud and stiff lipped to unleash their true feelings about each other and scream “YOU’RE SO SHIT IT’S UNBELIEVABLE!”.

We All Hate Leeds by I’m Bored of Bastards

Download We all hate Leeds field recording.

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2 Responses to You’re so shit it’s unbelievable!

  1. purile says:

    Rollercoaster of emotions lol

  2. Jesaw says:

    Marvellous Luke.

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